Blowout 101
December 22nd, 2009 — 10:36am
DJ Pauly D dropping some knowledge so you can be fresh for the holidays.
As someone who has had a blowout, let me tell you it is not easy to maintain. However if you have been rocking a blowout for 10 fucking years you probably should just end it all.
Jersey Shore Dodges A Grenade
December 18th, 2009 — 1:07pm
EVERYTHING I OWN!!!!!
That is what I would give to know this chick in real life today. Seriously, what do you do after Pauly D pulls the mid stair spin move just to get away from you and "The Situation" tears your apart in the confessional.
All of that action almost even made up for MTV pussying out and pulling the actual Snooki punch from the air, but in the end that will never be forgiven. Just like the guys should not be forgiven for not ripping this guys head off because "The Situation" and Pauly were probably lining up some broads to strike out with while Ronnie was aggressively eye gazing with Sammi, and is Vinny even on this show anymore? Real meatheads would have demolished that dude…
On another note JWOWW needs to figure her shit out and start sitting on a dick or she is going to be the biggest waste of talent since god invented breast reduction.
Note: I will not touch Ronnie crying because I don't know what to say and he is a friend of a friend and may rip my head off.
Ok, it was terrible…
Too Dumb For A Scarf??
December 15th, 2009 — 3:43pm
In case you are too retarded to use a scarf you can wear this dumb fucking thing to keep you warm. This is totally understandable because after all you could get your scarf caught in a car for or catch your death of cold because of gaps in your scarf.
Or if a scarf it too complicated you can try this one I made for you…
MTV To Cut Snickers Punch??
December 14th, 2009 — 11:02am
TMZ – MTV will not air the scene in "Jersey Shore" in which a drunken idiot coldcocks a female cast-member and knocks her out.
MTV told E!'s MarcMalkin the network consulted with experts (we're guessing Chris Brown) and decided the footage should be 86'd from the show.
The scene, which shows New York gym teacher Dan Ferro clocking Nicole "Snooki" Polizzi, was used in the MTV promo and then made the rounds.
MTV told Malkin the scene "has been taken out of context not to show the severity of this act or resulting consequences."
As for resulting consequences, Ferro was arrested, pled guilty and placed on probation.
The moment everyone has been waiting for isn't going to come????
We all know that I love Snickers more than life itself, but I have been counting down the days until she got dropped like an advent calendar in my mind since the first episode of this tragedy aired. Just when MTV pulled us back in, they drop the ball and fold like bitches. Or Snickers after a punch…
Bring back Carson Daly!!!
12/3/09 We Shall Never Forget
December 4th, 2009 — 12:33pm
40 years ago we went to the moon, and 40 years later we went to “The Shore”. I am going to go ahead and call last night premier of MTV’s Jersey Shore, “The Moon Landing of our Generation”.
Never before have I seen our generation as captivated by one single event enough that people from across the country, were constantly updating their Facebook and Twitter more than when we elected a black president. While many people may look at this as sad, I argue that it is totally deserved. I say this because MTV threw a perfect game with this concept and more importantly with this cast. Continue reading »
